I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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