Where are you?
In a non slutty way
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
