You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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