Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
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