the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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