why didn't you poke me back
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
