i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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