i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
