I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
