Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
