You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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