we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
