I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
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Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
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Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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