How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
