Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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