Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
The Olympian is in my bed
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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