just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
