so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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