she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
