Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
He did a backflip because drugs
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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