guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
