I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Bring me that man meat
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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