Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize