Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You took a bar mat shot.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
