I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
BRING THE BAGELS
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
