is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
