in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
