FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
