Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize