You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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