in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
