Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize