Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
