my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize