This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
