I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Randomize