Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
