If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
