Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
