He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
