She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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