You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
