mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm passing your future prison.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
The air was thick with penises
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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