So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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