If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
