i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize