i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
