Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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