I am puke
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
