Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
